Perfect
by ShIvErInG sMiLe
Summary: Children don't get to choose their parents. If they would, maybe things would be better. A very conflicted Vaughn will clear up his mind about his feelings for his only family member.


Hey guys. Hope you like this songfic. If you don't, just let me know. I know there are a lot like this one, about Vaughn and his dad but I just thought this song was "perfect". Just for those living under a rock, Perfect is performed by Simple Plan.

It takes place right after the first episode of the third season. Sorry, I can't remember the name.

"**Perfect"**

_Hey dad, look at me_

_Think back and talk to me_

_Did I grow up according to plan?_

This morning I woke up and I realized today was different. I went to school, talked to my friends, talked to her. I went to football practice, the science club. My every day's routine. Yet, it was different.

_Do you think I'm wasting my time_

_Doing things I wanna do?_

'_Cuz it hurts when you disapprove all along_

You don't get me. I've been alive for 16 years now dad. How much do you really know about me? You didn't even try, did you?

I betrayed my friends for you, the only ones I've ever had. But it was never good enough. It wasn't your fault that everyone hated me. It was my decision. A very wrong decision. But don't worry dad, I won't make that mistake twice.

_And now I try hard to make it_

_I just want to make you proud_

I was 8 when my teacher told you I was dyslexic. That was the first time I saw that look on your face. That disappointed look. You couldn't cope with the fact your only offspring wasn't as smart as you. The seed of Pearson being less than perfect. I had to deal with that by myself. All the nights I spent awake trying as hard as I could. But trying isn't winning. And if you can't win, why to even bother right?

_I'm never gonna be good enough for you_

_I can't pretend that I'm alright_

_And you can't change me_

It was cloudy that morning I came crying from the kinder garden. You just asked who had hit me this time. "Why don't I have a mom, dad?" You seemed puzzled, trying to figure out why I had asked something like that. It had bee mother's day and every kid had brought her mom to school. I was just sitting in a corner and a big bully came to me and told me that I was such a hideous boy and that my mother went away cause she didn't love me. "You shouldn't be talking about things you still don't understand". You didn't hold me nor show any emotion. You walked away and let me standing there with a million questions floating in my head. Even if mom had loved me, what about you dad?

'_Cuz we lost it all_

_Nothing lasts for ever_

_I'm sorry I can't be perfect_

_Now it's just too late_

_And we can't go back_

_I'm sorry I can't be perfect_

I went back on time. I saw you and mom at school. I remember seeing a sparkle in your eyes. You looked so alive; I've never seen you like that. What happened that make you so bitter? Was it just the accident? It may sound silly but perhaps… it was me.

_I try not to think_

_About the pain I feel inside_

_Did you know you used to be my hero?_

I imagine life with mom, the three of us together. Maybe I'd be happy. Maybe you'd be too. But we'll never know cause she's gone and I can't bring her back. Wishing doesn't make it truth. If it would, I wouldn't be a Pearson.

_All the days you spent with me_

_Now seem so far away_

_And it feels like you don't care anymore_

I'm just an instrument dad. You use and then you blow me off. I'm just a tool, an experiment that went wrong.

I told you about my feelings for her but you couldn't stand it. You wanted me to think she was using me. Newsflash dad, not everyone is like you! Some people can actually love someone without asking for anything back

_And now I try hard to make it_

_I just want to make you proud_

She taught me what trust meant. FRIENDSHIP. She showed me all the things I could be. She told me I could be good.

_I'm never gonna be good enough for you_

_I can't stand another fight_

_And nothing's alright_

You don't own me anymore dad. I've given my heart to someone else now and I don't care if it gets broken. I'm not afraid to use it. I don't wanna feel empty. I don't wanna be you.

'_Cuz we lost it all_

_Nothing lasts for ever_

_I'm sorry I can't be perfect_

_Now it's just too late_

_And we can't go back_

_I'm sorry I can't be perfect_

I really tried to be who you wanted me to but it took me a while to realize that it wasn't the person I wanted to become.

_Nothing is gonna change the things that you said_

Wish you understand

_Nothing is gonna make it right again_

I got to find out who I am

_Please don't turn your back_

In the end, you'll always be my only family

_I can't believe it's so hard to talk to you_

And I can't tell if you care

_Cause you don't understand_

But that's ok, really. Maybe one day you'll get why today was different cause this day I finally understood I'm not just a Pearson, I'm not just your son. I'm a living person dad, and I wanna know who Vaughn is. And if you don't love me anymore then, I guess there's a price to pay for freedom and I'm more than willing to accept it.

'_Cuz we lost it all_

_Nothing lasts for ever_

_I'm sorry I can't be perfect_

_Now it's just too late_

_And we can't go back_

_I'm sorry I can't be perfect_


End file.
